Ash Wednesday

I've just come back from an Ash Wednesday service. I have never been to one before and expected it to be the normal type of service 'from the book' but today was different. Earlier, I was looking for material for our Good Friday services and watched a short episode of Dr Who. It made me cry - crikey! What's the matter with me? Then during the service this evening I was overcome with a flash of comprehension of just what Jesus did for me. It was quite shocking, and I cried again. Carefully and thoughtfully I eagerly said the words in the book, '...you create us from the dust of the earth. Let these ashes be for us a sign of our repentance and a symbol of our mortality. May we always remember that by your grace alone we are given eternal life...' I've stopped crying now.

Well, that's it then. We had a great night talking about church and what it means to be afraid. We chatted for two and a half hours and ate pancakes and chocolate. We used up most of the flour and eggs, ready for Lent tomorrow. Then, when everyone had gone I poured my last cup of coffee for 46 days and drank it very slowly. The thought of not having a coffee until Easter is a little daunting (of course, if I want I can have a coffee on Sundays as these are feast days and don't count towards a fast). I'll let you know how I get on. Am I afraid? Just a bit.

I went on a structured retreat recently and we did this exercise. It was quite interesting and I ended up thinking hard on the result. You might like to give it a go. Find a quiet place away from everything for fifteen minutes and follow the instructions. If at any time you feel uncomfortable, please stop. Someone can read it to you or you can remember the steps, close your eyes and see what happens...

Imagine that there is a sculptor who is working on a statue of you behind the locked door. He gives you the key to the door so you can look at it. You unlock the door and the sculpture is in the middle of the room covered with a cloth. you walk up to it and take off the cloth. Step back and have a look at it. What's your first impression? Are you pleased/disatisfied? Study all the detail of it. What is it made from? How big is it? Walk around it and see it from different angles. Touch it. Is it rough or smooth? Which bits do you like and dislike?

Now become the statue. What does it feel like to be the statue? What kind of existence do you have as the statue?

Imagine that Jesus comes into the room. How does he look at you? What do you feel like when he is looking at you? What does he say to you? What do you say back to him? After a while he goes away. Now return to yourself. Look at the statue again. Is there any change in the statue? Is there any change in you or your feelings? Now say goodbye to your statue. Take a minute and open your eyes.